Nick is a cash game player, content creator and part of 888poker’s Stream Team. Each week he shares his thoughts and experiences as a player dedicated to the daily grind. This week, after a trip away, Nick is reminded of a cold, hard truth: poker doesn't care...
I wrote last week about how I was hoping my recent time off would reset my fortunes at the table and provide me with a fresh platform for recovery at the tables. It had been a rough year with very few breaks from play, and I had a fantastic holiday despite the bumpy ride back home.
But the reality is: poker doesn’t care. Poker doesn’t care that you’re feeling refreshed and motivated. Poker doesn’t care if you’re well prepared and studied. It’s still the same cruel game we know and love, and this past week has served as a stark reminder of that fact (if I needed one).
I guess I should have known better than to be remotely optimistic. After all, I am well known for being a beacon of negativity, and I am fairly closed off to anything not based entirely in reality. I certainly don’t think that mentality can affect which cards are dealt or anything comparable. I was, however, firmly open to the idea of a break giving me the mental reset I needed to approach the game in a different manner, allowing me to hopefully make some better decisions and give myself a chance of succeeding.
My 100NL graveyard
Even before I’d sat down for the first time after returning, I was feeling optimistic about playing and genuinely looking forward to battling again. I was stupid enough to believe that a ‘clean slate’ would give me the platform for a comeback. I even got some confirmation bias in the form of a clean 4 buy-in win on my first session back, where barely anything went wrong. I think what had actually happened is that I managed to forget how distinctively rotten this game can be regardless of your headspace.
In my first session back at 100NL, my main stake since completing the 10NL Challenge, I was swiftly brought back down to earth. Much like anyone else can experience for extended lengths of time, I once again struggled to win a cent when all-in preflop. Sadly, 100NL has been a true graveyard of preflop all-ins, with the only silver lining being that I’ve managed to make several compilation videos of me losing hand after hand in this manner, much to the delight of my viewers.
I can't change who I am
While this was without doubt frustrating, I may have been able to handle it in isolation. Like I said, it’s not out of the ordinary, despite being unfortunate. What I think others aren’t able to relate to is the manner in which I lose some other pots.
Streaming for a living is not something I’d ever take for granted, but the fact people are watching me and trying to beat me in the most hilarious way possible has produced some hands that I don’t believe are replicable in your average sample. I’m aware that my unhinged reactions are the reasons that players hunt me down so maniacally, but I can’t change who I am.
And it was one such hand within half an hour of my first session back that truly reminded me that nothing is ever going to change. After an open from the button, I 3-bet the big blind with 
and they called. I went for a half-pot continuation bet on a flop of 
, which my opponent decided to raise rather quickly. Not my favorite development, but I settled on a call after a small thought toward shoving there and then.
After the turn brought the 
and I checked, my opponent elected to shove all-in for around the size of the pot. I deliberated before deciding that there were enough draws I’d be ahead of to call it off. I slid in the $60, and no sooner had I registered that my opponent had 
for 4-high, than the river had peeled off the 
to complete a preposterous straight.
In that moment, any faint hope or optimism was annihilated. All two weeks of rest and recuperation were rendered completely worthless, and I was right where I was before I left.
I'm fully aware that a large part of my viewership is made up of people that enjoy watching me lose, and in some convoluted way I guess I should be thankful that my misfortune is in some way compensated. I know I have to take the rough with the smooth, even when the rough is as rough as this.
Even so, it would be nice to win an all-in against 4-high.
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Featured image courtesy of Gema Cristobal/888poker
